Sunday Recap #1

I've decided on a name for a new series of blogs. (That's a formal way of starting a blog and pretending you know what you're doing, when really, you just wanted to write and didn't know what about, so decided to come up with a name for those old weekly blogs I used to do...)

This week has been a weird one; there's been ups and downs and it's been flipping tiring. I got feedback on a MIT blog that I posted just over a week ago and that was positive, so that started well.
I headed to the coast with my Gran on Wednesday, which was refreshing, the sea air seems to solve anything and I managed to get a good nights sleep that night.
Then a long week of coursework and not getting far with a media essay took it's toll on me. Thursday, I spent my day feeling like I was going to pass out, throw up or just collapse in a heap at any given moment, oh the joys of anxiety.

Friday wasn't much better, I got my final school report EVER, can't say I finished on a high, but I think I'm now past caring and just want to get to the end of the course and attempt to pass it. It was also my last time leading at the church youth club that I have helped out at for just under 5 years and that was a hard one to say goodbye to. I helped out on Wednesday and Friday evenings and I loved it, but what with exams and other things happening, I couldn't quite hack it. I'm regretting it massively but short term it's definitely for the best. (I spent that evening forcing my way through a blog post for MIT, crying, eating chocolate - which I regretted massively feeling pretty ill later on, listening to sad music and crying some more).

Yesterday was long, although I went out in the evening with people and enjoyed Nuway Army, a Gary Numan tribute band, I forgot how much I loved his music and Tubeway Army's stuff, so I'm back on one of those music hypes I get on...
Today I've been tired, hated the wibbly-wobbly-rimey-wimey stuff that goes on when the clocks go forward but enjoyed breakfast out this morning and spending some time going through my poetry coursework and trying to come up with a understandable order for it all. Think I've given up with media now, really not the time eh? Hah.

Anyways, here's two songs to enjoy, and a few photos from the past week.
Some of the James Bay song lyrics punched me in the face nicely on Friday night and Bright City linked to the context of my week.

Let It Go - James Bay (link)

Colour - Bright City (link)

What have you been up to the past week?

-evan. :)

#DearMe

Dear 13-year-old Evan,

Three small things, your teeth will get better, you won't grow much and Duck will be sewn together a few more times... Onto the more meaningful things... 

In a few years, you will have changed your mind on what you want to do with your life, and that’s ok. Work experience will strengthen your passion for teaching, but your exam results and subject choices will start to put you off the idea, even though you’ve been set on it for most of your life. Choose subjects for you, don’t pick subjects you’re going to stress over and hate, because that’ll get you into a horrible rut of thinking you’re going to fail at everything, you’ll be close but you won’t quite fail.

Moving on from that point, positivity is key, not everything is going to go your way. Don’t let those things keep you down, keep going, they won’t last forever and you’ll soon learn to focus on the small things that make you happy.

Anxiety will kick in next year, learn to look after yourself, don’t get angry with yourself for not being able to do normal things some days. Spend a day in bed; just don’t spend half a week there. Go for a walk, listen to music, watch Toy Story, drink a cup of ‘funny’ tea, eat macaroni cheese (even if you can’t for much longer, make the most of it now!), do things to keep you calm.

Don’t give up on sport, you won’t realise how much it means to you until you stop. Spending five days a week doing cricket was tiring, but when you stop completely, suddenly it feels like you’ve gone into withdrawal. Find a middle ground, don’t give up on it just because you feel you’ve failed at it, it never failed you, fight your anxiety when it comes to batting, work on gaining confidence, you’ll get there eventually. Even if you get arthritic fingers from all the times you’ve dislocated and broken them, or bad knees just because your joints don’t like you, stick with it.

Friends will come and go. Your best friends now, won’t be your best friends in 5 years time and even though it might seem like they’re going to be there forever, stop taking that for granted. In a few years, everyone will move on, including you.

The next five years will see quite a few people pass away, people you regret not talking to much because they meant so much to you when you were younger, as well as people you look up to, people you care about, they’ll become stars and you won’t get the chance to say goodbye properly so just make the most of your time with them now.

You should be proud of things you achieve in the next few years, nothing will prepare you for your trip to Kenya, cherish the memories you make there. You'll go to the Olympics held in London, which  could be a once in a lifetime opportunity, soak up the atmosphere when Andy Murray wins. There will be many other experiences you should be thankful for and make the most of those (and scrapbook them when they actually happen, rather than forgetting about those smaller things that meant a lot to you). 

You’ll set up two blogs and one of them will grow more than you’d ever expect, you’ll be asked to write about musicians you’ve been listening to for years as well as getting to see so many artists and bands live and watch them grow and become well known all over. Even though there will be weeks where you won’t have the motivation to post, there will be people willing to wait for your next post. Keep at it. It could lead to what you do in the future.

From 18-year-old Evan.

What would you say to your younger self? Or even just 5 years ago?