inspiration.

.noun. the process of being mentally stimulated to do or feel something, especially to do something creative. 

Inspiration is a funny thing. It comes in waves, all at once or not at all and it can be found in the smallest and weirdest of places. Recently, creativity has been lacking, I feel that is partly down to the majority of ideas I put into my creative writing coursework, but I think I’d be lying to myself if I said it wasn’t to do with a lack of motivation in general too.

My other blog is now getting a little bigger, content is being shared more often and maybe I got a little sucked into that repetitive structured way of those music blogs I write, as I was lacking structure in my everyday life after finishing sixth form. 

Inspiration hasn’t exactly dried up completely and the amount of random words and sentences I’ve strung together and written down in random notebooks and on scraps of paper are actually a bit ridiculous. However, I haven’t had the motivation to actually type them up and share them with anyone. I’m slowly getting there with things in general (that’s coming in a future blog…) and I feel a ‘proper’ regular return to this blog is actually on its way. I don’t want to make any promises and at the same time I don’t want to apologise for not posting, because I’d rather share something I’m proud of and okay with sharing rather than some half-arsed crap attempt at writing something that’s come from my brain and doesn’t make any sense at all and isn’t really worthwhile sharing with anyone.

The first step of that has been making sure my brain is in the right place again; second has been working my brain a little, reading more often and watching things that get me inspired creatively, (Bertie Gilbert shorts, ThisBeDottie's YouTube videos, Submarine and Where The Wild Things Are) and writing everyday. Third was drafting those poems, thoughts and random ramblings into something that actually makes sense and finally having the confidence in my own writing and believing that it was good enough to upload and share then that post.

This is the first of those and hopefully more will follow, there may be a surge of posts from me, and then they will more than likely slow to once or twice a week; and the content will be honest and hopefully have a little more substance to them than those previously. I want to use my A Levels to get somewhere, but I don’t want to go the usual way about that. Uni isn’t for me, definitely not at the minute anyway, and if I change my mind that option will –hopefully – still be there a few years down the line; but for now I’m focusing on stepping out of my comfort zone and finding a new one.  

(I’m not sure if that last point made any sense and I probably jumped back and forth from point to point in this blog, but this is me saying I’m back and I’m going to be taking one day at a time.)