september and october.

September was a really weird month, a great month don't get me wrong, but an odd one. It started with me having a cold in Edinburgh, surrounded by a group of creative and wonderful people, and it ended with another cold in Surrey, surrounded by a different group of creative and wonderful people. I think it would be fair to say September was busy, productive and full of work.

I can't say that August was any more normal, nor October and I'm not sure November or even December are going to be 'normal' either, but I guess that all comes down to the fact that normal for me used to be going to school / college every day or having it on my mind for the last 15 years of my life and now I'm out in the big, wide world.

It's fair to say thinking about the future got too much, scared the crap out of me and left me a little burned-out. However, being surrounded by those creative and wonderful people, I briefly mentioned in the intro to this blog, I've been calmed down, pulled together and I think it's fair to say I'm safely back on my feet. So thank you to those few, you know who you are!

Music played a huge part of September 2015, in more ways than one. Whenever my mind starts to wander, get me to live music and it'll find it's way back again. If there's one thing I'm going to take away from the past months, it's that when people may let you down, music never will. To be honest, I knew this already but it has now been proven and noted in my list of stuff learnt outside of school... (but that leads onto two other blog posts...)

It's not often you can say you spent a whole week scouting open mics, seeing Ryan Keen in London and then saw S Club 7 (well three of them) on a night out in town - oh yeah, I actually went out for a full night, like left when the club turned the lights up - that wouldn't have happened a couple of months ago! All the adventures and fun of September could of course catch up with me and give me a massive slap across the face, and I'm sure this cold is some kind of punishment already, however, the next couple of months I've got an event to focus on and one that I'm hoping will be the start of bigger and better things! I'm excited.

I leave September and say thank you for the things you have taught me, about music, friends, productivity and creativity. I thank you for helping me find my feet again, and focusing my mind too, don't let others distract you, and don't feel guilty for having a down day, just get back up and fight the next.

(skip forward a month)... Music also played a huge part of October and I ventured to Bath with some friends too for a weekend and November sees me go on a weeks holiday, that I'm really looking forward to, and feel like I deserve to be honest. I've got my camera all set for some photos and videos whilst I'm away, so maybe expect a little blog post about that...

I've been kept on my feet the past couple of months and I don't mean this to sound a dramatic as it does, but I currently feel like I've got something to get out of bed for. I'm working on a big project which I'm hoping will come together and be a success, because if it doesn't I'm going to have to rethink my whole Plan C in life... but I'm telling myself I'll cross that bridge when I get to it...

Being surrounded by wonderful people in the past two months and keeping the amount of people that can annoy me to a realistic minimum has really inspired, as well as helped me. So thank you to the few people that have stuck with me recently.

'til next time! 

- evan :) 

inspiration.

.noun. the process of being mentally stimulated to do or feel something, especially to do something creative. 

Inspiration is a funny thing. It comes in waves, all at once or not at all and it can be found in the smallest and weirdest of places. Recently, creativity has been lacking, I feel that is partly down to the majority of ideas I put into my creative writing coursework, but I think I’d be lying to myself if I said it wasn’t to do with a lack of motivation in general too.

My other blog is now getting a little bigger, content is being shared more often and maybe I got a little sucked into that repetitive structured way of those music blogs I write, as I was lacking structure in my everyday life after finishing sixth form. 

Inspiration hasn’t exactly dried up completely and the amount of random words and sentences I’ve strung together and written down in random notebooks and on scraps of paper are actually a bit ridiculous. However, I haven’t had the motivation to actually type them up and share them with anyone. I’m slowly getting there with things in general (that’s coming in a future blog…) and I feel a ‘proper’ regular return to this blog is actually on its way. I don’t want to make any promises and at the same time I don’t want to apologise for not posting, because I’d rather share something I’m proud of and okay with sharing rather than some half-arsed crap attempt at writing something that’s come from my brain and doesn’t make any sense at all and isn’t really worthwhile sharing with anyone.

The first step of that has been making sure my brain is in the right place again; second has been working my brain a little, reading more often and watching things that get me inspired creatively, (Bertie Gilbert shorts, ThisBeDottie's YouTube videos, Submarine and Where The Wild Things Are) and writing everyday. Third was drafting those poems, thoughts and random ramblings into something that actually makes sense and finally having the confidence in my own writing and believing that it was good enough to upload and share then that post.

This is the first of those and hopefully more will follow, there may be a surge of posts from me, and then they will more than likely slow to once or twice a week; and the content will be honest and hopefully have a little more substance to them than those previously. I want to use my A Levels to get somewhere, but I don’t want to go the usual way about that. Uni isn’t for me, definitely not at the minute anyway, and if I change my mind that option will –hopefully – still be there a few years down the line; but for now I’m focusing on stepping out of my comfort zone and finding a new one.  

(I’m not sure if that last point made any sense and I probably jumped back and forth from point to point in this blog, but this is me saying I’m back and I’m going to be taking one day at a time.)